Thanksgiving Standing Stones 2013

I have a tradition at Thanksgiving to make a list of “standing stones”—the things that I look back on in the year and say “look at what God has done.”  Last year was full of big and joyful milestones, like being ordained.  This year is a bit more subdued, especially the last few months.  But still, I am thankful for the opportunities and gifts God has given me this year. 


Travelling to the UK for three weeks in January.  I got to experience the church and culture, which despite common stereotypes, caused me to say look what God is doing!





Performing my first baptisms of two young people that came to the United States as refugees.  Their faith is rich, deep, and growing as they have faced many difficulties in their short lives.  I am thankful that I got to be a small part of their stories.




I got to go on lots of short camping trips this Spring, Summer, and Fall.  It was wonderful to spend lots of time outside hiking, eating, reading, watching birds, and enjoying the wonders of God’s creation.  (If you’re curious, the photo is from May in Tahquamenon State Park Rivermouth Semi-Modern Campground.)


My pastoral residency at Church of the Servant, which ended at the end of July.  This one is definitely bittersweet—I really miss being a pastor there, but I am so overwhelmingly grateful for the two years I got to spend there learning, loving, preaching, visiting, baptizing, welcoming, and being loved.




The two weeks I got to spend in Colorado and Wyoming during October.  I spent time with Mary and Jared (my sister and brother-in-law), and my friend Allison and her family.  I saw a whole new part of God’s creation—an exhilarating part.  I even climbed mountains, sort of.  At least I went on a short hike above the treeline.  


Having a spiritual director who helps me each month to see what God is doing in my life.  I am thankful for her support and encouragement that God is working in me, even when I can’t see exactly what God is doing yet.


I am so thankful for the gift of friends who have listened to me, waited with me, encouraged me, prayed for me, discerned with me, and loved me.  I really would not have made it through these years without them.


“Save us, Lord our God, and gather us from the nations, that we may give thanks to your holy name and glory in your praise.”

-- Psalm 106:47

Photo of spiritual direction feet by Michelle Kroll, used under a Creative Commons License.  All other photos are my own.

Autumn Adventures

I’ve been pretty silent on the blog, but I’ve been having plenty of adventures in these autumn months.

Canning my mom’s famous salsa with four generations of my family (Grandpa, Mom, Cousin, Cousin’s son)

I spent a few hours exploring ArtPrize in downtown Grand Rapids.  This was one of my favorite pieces, called Cascade.

 

I headed west for a couple of weeks.  First, I spent time with my sister and brother-in-law in their new home in Colorado.

Mary and I drove up to Independence Pass, about 40 miles of mountain driving from their house.

It was peak color season for the Aspens and their vivid gold against the deep evergreens was spectacular.  For anyone wondering, late September or early October is an excellent time to visit—the weather and trees are beautiful and it is considered “shoulder season” so things aren’t so busy.

Mary is talented and made a video of our time together.  It features lots of footage of mountains, aspens, their canine companion, a gondola ride, and me awkwardly crossing a footbridge.  You can see it on her blog.

Next stop: Laramie, Wyoming.  This was a new state for me, and it was like no other place I’ve been to.

My reason for going to Wyoming: visiting my friend Allison, her husband, and infant son!  It was so good to see them!

Back to Michigan: an impromptu lunch at Crane’s Pie Pantry with my mom—apple dumpling and apple cider…yum!

An afternoon hike to Hoffmaster State Park

Lake Michigan from Hoffmaster’s Dune Overlook

Goodbye, Grand Rapids

Tonight is the last night I will sleep in my apartment in Grand Rapids.  For the foreseeable future, it is the last night I will stay in GR as a resident, and not someone’s guest.  This is a sad night for me.  This is the place I became an adult.  I have lived here for 3/4 of my adult life.  I went to Calvin College here.  I went to Calvin Theological Seminary here.  I had my first call at Church of the Servant here.  Living in Grand Rapids has shaped me in so many ways. 
People love to hate Grand Rapids; some call it “bland rapids.”  It is not as big or as cosmopolitan as New York or Chicago.  But Grand Rapids has its own charm.  There are lots of wonderful places and things to do in Grand Rapids.  Let me share a few of my favorites with you:

• Calvin College—where I learned how to be a thinking Christian mindful of the broader world
• Oakdale Park CRC—the church I attended while I was at Calvin
• Ice skating at Rosa Park circle
• Little Africa Ethiopian restaurant—a favorite place my friends would go when we were at Calvin
• $5 student tickets to the Grand Rapids Symphony
• Calvin Theological Seminary—where I did the formal education part of becoming a pastor
• Monroe Community Church—the church that loved me through seminary
• Kava House
• Art Prize—most interesting and fun thing that has started in GR recently
• The Green Well—a favorite with some of my seminary-era friends
• Peking Wok (which has very sadly closed)
• Eerdman’s Bookstore—they have a great selection of discount Eerdman's books
• Concerts at Calvin College—why didn’t I go to more when I was a student?  They have really interesting artists
• The Festival of Faith and Writing—so many wonderful readers and writers gathered together
• Church of the Servant—where I became a pastor
• Summer concerts at the Fredrik Meijer Gardens Amphitheater
• Bethany Refugee Services and the hundreds of refugees that are resettled here every year
• Baker Books and Icons Coffee—wonderful bookstore and coffee shop really close to my house
• Kentwood Public Library

And of course, the people are such an important part of Grand Rapids and my experience here.  Professors and friends from Calvin College.  Professors, staff, and students at Calvin Seminary, where I was enfolded into community.  Other wonderful friends that I made during my seminary days.  Colleagues and congregants at Church of the Servant.  I wouldn’t be who I am without all of you all.
I don’t know where I am going to land in the future, but I am thankful for the ways Grand Rapids has shaped me, and I am excited to take that with me to my unknown destination.  Thanks, Grand Rapids.  Its been great!  

We Will, God Helping Us

I just came home from a vacation to the U.P. (Michigan’s Upper Penninsula).  One of my best friends got married in St. Ignace (just across the bridge) this weekend.  We had all of the usual wedding “stuff”—pretty dresses, special hair, a rehearsal dinner, wedding party photos, a ceremony, reception dinner, cake cutting, and dancing. 

The happy couple!

The thing that really stands out to me about this weekend is community.  Liz and I are part of a group of friends that she also asked to be in the wedding.  We all lived in Grand Rapids for a while, but many have moved away—Chicago, Laramie, St. Ignace.  We miss spending our Saturday evenings watching TV and having deep discussions with each other (yes, those two things can happen simultaneously, but are not necessarily related).  We miss having holiday parties together and celebrating birthdays (birthday dinner before a Good Friday service and birthday cake after, yes we did that once).  We miss laughing and crying as we did life together.  We have walked together through the rigors of grad school and ordination, finding and starting new jobs, and relationships progressing from dating to marriage to pregnancy. 

This weekend was a beautiful reunion for us.  Four of us drove up north together and then we stayed in a hotel suite together.  We watched parts of random movies on cable, explored St. Ignace, celebrated the coming children, and laughed together.  It was a wonderful continuation and renewal of our friendship and the community that has meant so much to us.  

     

Friends with the Mackinaw Bridge!  (I'm behind the camera)

This community is important for my own life in many ways.  And it is also important for the health of the new marriage that we witnessed and celebrated.  Even though our culture often says that marriage is all about two people, marriage doesn’t exist in a vacuum.  Marriages need community, too.

The groom had a group of friends and family gathered, too, along with many people from the churches that he serves.  Together, I hope all of these communities take seriously the promises we made as part of the wedding:

“Families, friends,

and all those gathered here

with Jeremy and Liz,

will you support and care for them,

sustain and pray for them

in times of trouble,

give thanks with them

in times of joy,

honor the bonds of their covenant,

and affirm the love of God

reflected in their life together?”

We promised “we will.”  We will, God helping us, live out these promises.  We will be a community that will support this couple in their marriage.

As their symbol of unity, we celebrated communion together.  This is common in Lutheran weddings (Jeremy’s Lutheran).  It was a beautiful act of worship to celebrate how Christ brings us together in love.  We are united with Christ in baptism.  And through Christ, we are united to each other.  Some are united in matrimony, and we are all united in the Church.  This unity was the joy we celebrated this weekend in a wedding ceremony and late night chats.

The St. Ignace lighthouse outside the reception site

Photos from several friends, shared on Facebook, except for the final photo which is a personal photo, all May 2013.

Grains of Hope

“We have, what do you call it, a small bit of wheat at the end of stalk, a grain.  We have what you would call, grains of hope.  When I face, when I am in darkness, even there when I am beaten and tortured every day, I have hope.  I do not stop.  That is what keep me alive.” 

These words came from the lips of a man who came as a refugee to Grand Rapids, and they became the title of the play Grains of Hope.  Grains of Hope is an ethnographic play created by Stephanie Sandberg and the Calvin Theater Company.  Stephanie and Calvin students interviewed over 100 people in West Michigan who came here as refugees or work closely with refugees.  From those interviews, she chose 7 stories—7 people—to feature at the center of the play.   An 18 year old woman who came to Grand Rapids from Vietnam with her family when she was three years old.  A man who fled Sudan as a child and when he eventually came to Grand Rapids, all he knew of America was Mickey Mouse printed on a t-shirt.  A Bhutanese man who spent 15 years of his life living in a refugee camp in Nepal in a simple bamboo house with dirt floors.  In the play, actors brought each of these characters to life using their own words from the interviews.  

They told of how they came to be in Grand Rapids and what they have faced since they arrived.  Stories of the difficulties of learning English and finding work.  They told stories of struggles to find good and affordable housing.  And they told stories of friendship and the people who have helped them along the way--middle school teachers, caseworkers, and doctors, an English tutor who became a friend, an older woman who became a family’s adopted mother and grandmother.

This play was performed 13 times in various locations around Grand Rapids over the last few weeks.  My congregation was privileged to host one of the performances last Sunday evening.  We have been active in working with refugees for many years, and several of the people who appeared in the play were members of our church who have developed relationships with families who came as refugees.  It was moving to see their dedication over the years brought to life. 

An actress telling the story of a woman who came from the DR Congo

As I watched the play, there were points where I was almost in tears at the stories.  Even the people who I don’t know personally have elements of their stories that are similar to stories I have heard from people that I know.  These are people that have welcomed me into their homes with various kinds of chai, fruit, and other snacks.  Who seem glad to have me there, even if much of the conversation around me is in a language that I don’t understand.  Who have loved me and prayed for my mom when she had surgery last winter.  They are people who have come through horrific circumstances to a new life in America.  And that life isn’t necessarily easier—safer and with a higher material standard of living, perhaps—but with the new challenges of DHS who cuts benefits (like food stamps) if you miss a letter or appointment, a mind-bogglingly complex medical system, and a culture that is independent to the extreme. 

I am so inspired by the people I know who arrived here as refugees.  I have seen Christ in them, again and again.  I am thankful for the opportunity to get to know so many of them in the past few years.  I have seen their hope, even in midst of despair.  I hope some of that has rubbed off on me.  And I hope that I and churches across North America would offer the friendship that gives hope to dealing with the transitions.  I pray that we would reflect Christ to our friends, because Jesus is the source of true hope.

Resources:

Video promo of Grains of Hope

Bethany Refugee Services

Refugee Stories from the UNHCR

11 Facts About Refugees

Wheat photo by Marilylle Soveran, http://www.flickr.com/photos/86953562@N00/47812279/, used under a Creative Commons License.
Play photo from Calvin College publicity, http://www.calvin.edu/news/archive/grains-of-hope

Sunday Afternoon Prayer: A Prayer for Those Who are Lonely

I met a profoundly lonely woman this week.  This is my prayer for her, and for all others who feel alone.

 God of the Broken-Hearted,

There are so many people who are lonely in this world.

Left behind after the death of their husband or wife.

Wishing that they had children to care for them as they age.

Devastated after a marriage disintegrated.

Missing friends who had to move away.

Unable to sustain friendships.

Forced to leave homeland and family to flee for their lives.

Feeling alone in the midst of a crowd.

Jesus, you know this feeling.

You cried out from the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

To each person who feels you have forsaken them,

Show up in a profound way.

May they know you as Emmanuel, God-with-them.

God-with-them when they sit in their apartment alone.

God-with-them when the tears pour down their face.

God-with-them as they wonder if this will ever end.

God, work through your people, the body of Christ, the church. 

Inspire your people to go out of their way to find the lonely-hearted.

Give them time and patience to walk with them through dark valleys.

May the body of Christ become our new family,

A place of trust, where the lonely find solace,

Where they met you.

In Jesus’, our Emmanuel's name.

Amen.

Photo by Dino ahmad ali,  http://www.flickr.com/photos/dinoowww/4125584110/.  Used under a Creative Commons License

Singleness is Sanctifying, Too

I’ve often heard that marriage is sanctification.  Sanctification is the theological word for becoming holy or becoming like Christ.  In a good marriage, people learn about themselves and getting along with others.  There is no denying God uses marriage to help people grow in their faith and become more Christ-like.  The problem is that every time we say this, it implies that you can’t really be sanctified if you aren’t married.  It reinforces the notion that serving God as a married person is better than serving God as a single person. 

Sanctification does not require marriage.  There are many ways that God sanctifies us.  Even more, marriage is not necessarily a better or quicker way to sanctification.  In fact, singleness can be part of sanctification, too.  Being single is a different training ground, but I truly believe it too can be fertile soil for becoming Christ-like.    

 One area of fertile soil is identity and trust.  Without another person, I am forced to deepen my identity in Christ.  I am not tempted to think that my boyfriend or husband is able to complete me.  I am who I am not because of my relationship status or who I am connected to.  I am a baptized daughter of God.  This is true of all of us who are in Christ, but being single takes away a temptation to find identity elsewhere. 

I have learned to trust God in different ways than if I was married.  I don’t have another person to rely on.  If I don’t have a job, there is no one else to support me.  If I have a stressful meeting, no one is waiting at home to comfort me.  If I need to make a decision, there is no one to help make the decision.  Instead, I live by faith.  I am learning to trust that God will provide for my needs.  I am learning to trust that God hears my prayers and binds up my broken heart.  I am learning to trust that God leads me and guides me in decision making.  Being single is fertile soil for sanctification in trust.     

This might sound counter-intuitive, but I have found being single to be a place to learn about community and hospitality.  You have to be intentional about developing community, when you don’t have built-in community with your spouse (although I would argue you still need to develop community with others when you’re married).  It takes work to maintain relationships.  There’s a learning curve to relationships—I have had to learn how to be vulnerable and let others in.  But those relationships can be sweet, friends that are family.  They are a community that has walked through some dark valleys, empty desserts, and sun-filled meadows with me.  I am better at all of the one-anothers we find in scripture because of this community.

 

The really awesome empty tomb cake my mom made for our Easter celebration!

Being single is also an opportunity to offer hospitality to others.  Before even offering hospitality, being single has given me a different insight into what it is like to be at the margins.  I don’t fit into what society expects, and it has made me more conscious of other people who might be feeling a bit out of place.  I want my life to be one that welcomes people in and gives them a place to feel at home.  What I desire to offer isn’t the stereotype of hospitality: dinner parties for couples or huge family dinners.  There is freedom associated with singleness and the type of hospitality I can offer.  I don’t have to figure out which family I’m going to spend holidays with.  This year, my parents came to celebrate Thanksgiving at my apartment with some of the refugees I work with.  At Easter, I took a family to my parents’ house for dinner.  I still have lots to learn (sanctification is a process, after all), but it is definitely a way that God is forming me.   

Getting married is not the only way to become sanctified.  There are plenty of sanctifying experiences and situations that come along with being single.  And so for all of us—whether married or single—my prayer is that we will “grow in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church” (Ephesians 4:15, NLT).


Personal photos taken on Iona, Scotland and at my parents' house in Michigan, taken in January and March 2013.

An Odd and Wondrous Moment

There is a book about pastoral ministry called “this odd and wondrous calling.”  That title phrase captures so much of what my pastoral experience has been, so far.  There have been odd moments.  There have been wondrous moments.  And there have been many moments that are both odd and wondrous: someone sharing how the Holy Spirit spoke to them through a sermon I didn’t think was that good, kneeling to pray on the floor of a Nepalese family’s apartment to pray after an exhausting and scary day, and giving the charge to a friend at her ordination. 

When my friend asked me to give the charge, I said yes immediately.  The charge is one of the last parts of the ordination service, when another pastor encourages the newly ordained pastor in keeping the weighty ordination vows they have just taken.  It is often one of the most personal parts of the service.  I was excited and honored to have this part in her celebration. 

And then I started to think about what I would say.  I started to get cold feet, wondering how I could possibly say something worthy of the occasion.  It seemed like a job better suited to someone with thirty years of ministry experience, not someone who is at the beginning of their ministry journey.

But I said I would do it, so I prayed for words and settled into writing it.  I wrote lines, deleted them, and wrote more.  As I wrote and edited, I found one of those odd and wondrous moments.  The charge is a formal encouragement in ministry, in remaining faithful to the vows you have taken.  But as I was writing I realized that we give each other informal charges all the time.  We encourage each other as we share experiences and ask “what would you do?” or “what do you think I should do?”  We encourage each other as we pray for the difficult and messy situations we face.  We encourage each other to stay faithful to our vows and grow in love for God and his people as we simply spend time together. 

As I wrote and then gave the charge, I discovered that it actually made sense for me to give this charge and not someone who has been doing this forever.  We’re going to live this out together--encouraging, challenging, learning, and discovering.  I’m looking forward to discovering more odd and wondrous moments in the midst of our calling together.     

Personal photo, February 2013

Sunday Afternoon Prayer: A Prayer for the Year to Come

I'm continuing the birthday theme for one last post (previous here and here), with my prayer for the coming year of my life.

God my help in years past and hope for years to come,

Thank you for your faithfulness in the past year,

For grace in difficult situations,

For growth as a pastor

For relationships that have supported me.

And in this year to come, may I be a person of

Strength,

Joy,

Stability, and

Hospitality.

May I grow in my

relationship with you,

prayer life,

memorized scripture, and

identity in Christ.

May I live in community with friends

Near,

Far,

Old, and

New.

May I serve you

Faithfully,

With wisdom,

With self-less love for others, and

Wherever you call me.

May I be filled with joy

Exploring your creation,

Creating beautiful things,

Laughing with friends,

And trying new things.

May whatever I do,

Whether in word or in deed,

Be done in the name of Jesus.

In Jesus’ name.  Amen.

Personal photo taken in the Iona Abbey, Iona, Scotland, January 2013. 

Thanks to the Women Who Have Formed Me

When I was on the Isle of Iona in Scotland during January, I visited the Nunnery.  The Nunnery is the ruin of an Augustinian nunnery built in the thirteenth century.  For several hundred years, women lived, worked, and worshipped here.  Their lives were similar to the men who lived in the abbey down the road.  They worshipped God together.  They prayed.  They grew and prepared food for themselves.  They took care of the sick and needy.  They offered hospitality to those in need.  They lived in community with each other.

Nunnery Church

But these women's names and stories are mostly forgotten.  The ruins have not ben restored, and it is said that this is one of the best preserved nunneries in the British Isles.  As I explore the island I used a book called Around a Thin Place, published by the Iona Community's publishing house, to help guide my reflection at significant points.  At the Nunnery it calls attention to women of faith, both this whose names history has remembered and forgotten.  

Me and the Nunnery

It also asked us to remember women whose lives have shaped us.  I started to list women whose faith and love have shaped me, and it is a long, long list.  It starts with my mom, grandmothers, sisters, aunts, and cousins.  Sunday school teachers and other adults from church growing up.  Family friends.  Women I went to college with.  My teammates in China.  Friends God gave me during my seminary years.  Mentors and colleagues in ministry.  

My mom and I at my ordination.  I love this picture!

I wouldn't be who I am without them.  God has used them to shape me.  To give me examples of loving Christ and serving the church.  To encourage the gifts they saw in me.  To challenge me and console me.  Today is my birthday, and as I reflect on my life I thank God for all of these women and the impact they have had on me.  And as I look to the future, I pray that I will have such an impact on those around me now and those who will look to me in the future.

"I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also" (2 Timothy 1:5). 

P.S. Many men have shaped me too, and I am thankful for them too.

UK #7: The Iona Community

Iona Abbey

One of the reasons the Isle of Iona has contemporary significance and is well-known in some Christian circles is the Iona Community. I think in North America we sometimes think of them as being the whole island, but they are not. In fact they share the abbey with Historic Scotland who cares for and manages the site. 

In the 1930s, in the midst of the Great Depression, a pastor named George MacLeod came up with the idea to restore the abbey using unemployed craftsmen and young pastors (so they would have training before they went to urban missions). In addition to their construction work, they practiced living in community. Today the Iona Community is "an ecumenical Christian community of men and women engaged together, and with people of goodwill across the world, in acting, reflecting,and praying for justice, peace and the integrity of creation; convinced that the inclusive community we seek must be embodied in the community we practice." It is a sort of untraditional monastic order. Members commit to live by a shared rule which includes daily prayer and Bible reading, mutual accountability for use of time and money, meeting together, and action for justice and peace. There are about 300 members, mostly in Britain. They are divided into geographical family groups. There are also 1450 associate members and 1250 friends scattered across the world "from Michigan to Malawi." 

The abbey on Iona serves as a sort of base. There is a core group of resident staff, and from March to October they offer week-long experience of living in community for people from around the world. They also maintain daily worship at the abbey, which is open to the public. I joined in a couple of their morning prayer services while I was on the island. They were small, quiet gatherings with a few songs, prayers of confession and intercession, and a scripture reading. Each day in their intercessory prayer, they pray for specific countries, specific needs, and specific members of the community (on a cycle that all members follow). 

Chapel where worship is held in the winter

 Before coming, I was probably most familiar with the Iona Community's publishing and especially liturgical resources. I think that is probably what has made the biggest worldwide impact. We have used some of their liturgies at ÇOS (an excerpt I shared). Many songs we sing regularly come through the Wild Goose Resource Group: "He Came Down, " "Take, O Take Me As I Am," "Your Will Be Done On Earth," "Come Now, O Prince of Peace," "Come All You People" and more. 

 What I knew less about was the Community's commitment to advocate for social justice and peace. In the Abbey church, they have some displays about different justice issues. Their shop is completely fair trade (much of it local). It was a great place to do a bit of shopping. I am not exactly sure what this commitment looks like in the everyday life of a member, but I would be curious to find out some day. Looking at this ancient building and place and seeing Christians confront modern problems and experiences is inspiring. Throughout my trip so far, I have noticed that trend--communities breathing new life into old places and practices without demolishing the old. 

Displays on social justice issues

I am fascinated by the idea of living in community, while not actually living together. Things like their rule bind them together, but they can actually be spread apart. I wonder what this could look like in other situations. I am thinking especially of pastor-types who make friends and have community, but move often. This question of how to have community when people keep moving or getting married and moving, knowing there is a good chance I'll be moving this summer has been on my mind in the past few months.

St. John's cross (modern replica)

 I wonder if we could create a community for ourselves based not on living near each other, but on a rule that we would create and a commitment that we would continue to support each other. I think our rule would look a bit different than the Iona Community, but I think it could work. I would be interested to try.

UK #4: The Wedding

Wedding Flowers

While I was in Poole, I was privileged to attend J's wedding.  J and I were teammates when we were both English teachers in China.  We left China the same year, and she moved to England shortly after while I started seminary.  A bit over two years ago, she met a British man and they decided to get married.  It was an pleasure to see her so filled with joy on her wedding day, and I am thankful that I was able to observe a British wedding.  This post is a collection of reflections on the experience.

A wedding is an example of both the great similarities between British and American customs, but also the great differences.  We hold many core customs in common (as opposed to say, China, where customs are drastically different).  But there are also differences.  For example, in a British wedding, the bridesmaids walk down the aisle ahead of the bride, but then sit in the first row of seats, along with the bride's parents.

With other China friends at the reception

Overall, it seems like a British wedding may be slightly less of a production, and less commercial than an American one.  It is possible that isn't a fair statement, since I only observed one wedding and it wasn't completely typical, but that was my overall impression.  Things like napkins printed for the reception aren't done.  There is less emphasis on the bridesmaids and groomsmen.  There are fewer parties before the wedding.  One of the parents often makes the wedding cake (a fruitcake is traditional), in this case the groom's mother--and it was really good.  

I really appreciated the Church of England wedding liturgy.  One of the things that struck me about it is how thoroughly Trinitarian it is.  There was no mistaking what this marriage is founded on and what it is about.  I also really appreciated that in the very beginning of the service, the congregation was asked "Will you, the families and friends of G and J, support and uphold them in their marriage now and in the years to come?"  I think it is an important reminder that no couple should enter a marriage alone, but they must remain rooted in a community that will encourage and support them.  I will be borrowing this or something similar when I do a wedding.

First dance

I was also impressed with the way the wedding was planned and led when they knew that a significant portion of the guests are not practicing Christians.  It was a profoundly Christian in liturgy, songs, and readings.  Nothing was watered down.  Some of it might not have made complete sense without some knowledge of Christianity.  But the officiants didn't use it as an occasion to evangelize explicitly.  They let people enter, in a way, the life of faith.  To observe what it looks like to start a marriage as "a cord of three strands." I hope and pray that everyone sensed the love and joy of the bride and groom, but also their church and faith community.